nothings here for me.. but you
8:51 p.m. - 2005-10-04

here i am.. again.. completly heartbroken.. i feel numb but hurting so extremely at the same time.. After everything we've been through.. after all the breaks.. after all the laughs the kisses.. the loves.. hes gone again.. saying he needs yet again another break.. all i can think is.. weren't we just on one? didn't you come back to me and say that you loved me.. wasn't that only 4 days ago.. how can one person make such a 180.. how can a person.. do that? make me feel completly loved one day and then the next make me feel like such a horrible person.. how can a person think that so easily and so fast? How can i hurt so bad?
He told me that it seemslike the only reason he is me anymore is to not hurt me.. I feel more hurt now that i then i ever would if he had just broken up with me.. I feel toyed with.. i feel like the one person we alwasy made fun of.. the one couple.. they alwasy took breaks and would get back together.. and we said we would never be like that..I gave up everything for him... i gave him everything i ever could.. he said hes given me too many chances.. that i will never learn.. but i dont he realizes just.. how much i've learned this past month.. how much i value.. how much i would do.. how much i have already done.. for us..

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